freaks

I've never been the most socially adjusted person. Socializing, for me, has been a learned thing. I've gotten relatively good at it, but every once in a while I get the creeping feeling that I'm not exactly saying the right things in the right company. Too much information, sometimes, or sometimes off-topic. Or sometimes something completely tasteless.

When I was 15, I was in a play in Ireland. The whole thing involved a king's Asian concubines who were shut up in his tomb when he died, along with the builders of the tomb and all that. They danced around, ate the king's body to survive and generally talked about things that didn't make much sense. It wasn't the most well-written play.

The concubines ranged in age from six to sixty. After I flew back that December to New Jersey and stayed at my aunt's house, I was trying to explain this to her. She didn't understand what the king would have wanted with a six year old concubine. I told her:

"Well, they've all got holes."

Of course, the room went quiet. It slowly dawned on me what I'd said, and I walked around red-faced and jet-lagged the rest of the day.

Excuse me if I'm not always the best person to talk to. I try hard, and I listen really well. Honest.

Here're some more freaks:

Funny Flaps

Willy Wonky

Those crack me up every time I watch 'em....